She did not, indeed, think he had set out
to insult her, but the unhappy fact was patent that he knew the wanton
Sally, and that he had a tender regard for her. Lavinia's reading of the
thing was that in her anxiety she had arrived at the trysting place too
soon. Ten minutes later and Vane would have got rid of his old love and
taken on with his new one. Oh, it was humiliating to think of!
Lavinia walked away in her rage. By the time she reached Little Queen
Street, the storm had passed. She had arrived at the conclusion that all
men were faithless, selfish, dishonourable. For the future she would
have naught to do with them.
The excitement of the rehearsal, the sense of independence she felt when
all was got through with credit, lent her buoyancy, but it did not last.
The dream she had once had of playing to an audience and seeing only
Lancelot Vane in the first row of the pit applauding and eager to
congratulate her, was gone. She was done with him for ever. So she told
herself. And to strengthen this resolve she recalled his weaknesses, his
vacillation, his distrust in himself, his lapses into inebriety. Yet no
sooner had she gone over his sins than she felt pity and inclined to
forgiveness. But not forgiveness for his faithlessness. That was
unpardonable.
Mrs. Egleton, her fellow lodger, had the night before gone to bed sober
and was inclined to be complaisant and to interest herself in Lavinia.
Pages:
197
198
199
200
201
202
203
204
205
206
207
208
209
210
211
212
213
214
215
216
217
218
219
220
221